Hello students. Let's jump in the time machine and go back to math class. woosh! There we go. See? Time travel was quick and painless. Who knew? Here we are. Math 101. Oh look there you are listening intently. Let's listen too.
"...and if you take the square root of 3600, multiply that by the sum of 357/459 and 28/126, then add the number of ghatikas in the ancient Hindu day (being sure to take into account the proper aging and manipulation of the vitis vinifera) you'll easily see how we get the answer."
Uh. OK. So maybe going back to math class wasn't the best of ideas to understand what's going on. woosh!! (Back to the present time) Let me just break it down for you:
Take 60 years. Add 60 paintings. And you get 60 bottles of wine. OK, so you don't normally, but this Saturday you do. No it has nothing to do with the once-in-a-lifetime alignment of Pluto and Uranus.
It's because Fred Swarr (aka Dad) is turning 60!!! And to celebrate this great milestone, he will be painting 60 painting in 1 day! You heard it: 60 PAINTINGS!! ONE DAY!! On Saturday, August 4th from 7 AM until 5 PM it'll be paint paint paint in Mt. Gretna (directions here). Then, at 5 o'clock you (yes, YOU!) will be able to get one of these momentous paintings for the mere price of a bottle of wine. Now that's a deal you can't beat anywhere. Snazzy, huh?
Ladies and gentlemen, feel free to come out at any time to see the master of majestic mayhem paint a plethora of perfect and priceless paintings. Well....by "priceless" I mean "the price of a bottle of wine".
This is a once in a lifetime experience!!! So play your part and help an old man get enough alcohol to last him until his next birthday (or at least until next week). If you don't feel like giving up a bottle of wine, at least come out and cheer him on. After all it is his 60th.
Make us proud, Dad! Paint away.
-The Other Swarrs